Protecting your child from harm is the most important duty you will face during the teenage years. Research from Columbia University reveals that parents who exert their parental authority by taking a “hands-on” approach to raising their children not only have a better relationship with their children, but also reduce their child’s risk of harming themselves with drugs and alcohol.

The following twelve parental characteristics are associated with decreased risk for substance abuse among teens:

1. Parents who expect to be told where their teenager is going in the evenings and on the weekends
2. Parents who make it clear that they would be very upset if their teen tried marijuana
3. Parents who always know where their child is after school, evenings, and weekends
4. Parents who monitor what the teen is watching on TV
5. Parents who restrict the kind of music their teen can purchase
6. Parents who are very aware of how their teenager is doing in school
7. Parents who monitor internet usage
8. Families who have dinner together 6-7 times per week
9. Teenagers who have a weekend curfew
10. Adults who are home when a teenager returns from school
11. Teens who are responsible for regular chores
12. Families whose TV is not on during dinner

Hands on Parents are those who consistently achieve at least 10 of the 12 actions described above. Unfortunately, only about one quarter of teens live with “hands-on” parents.

“Hands-off” parents consistently fail to set rules and monitor their teen’s behavior. Of the 12 actions described above, these type of parents routinely achieve five or less. Consequently, their children are more likely to engage in high-risk behaviors. In truth, teenagers need their parents to establish rules and expectations. It’s one of the ways they feel loved and protected. In sharp contrast to contemporary thinking about child-rearing, children with hands on parents seldom rebel or pull away. On the contrary, the research confirms that “hands-on” parents are much more likely to have an excellent relationship with their teens than permissive parents.

It’s never too late to become a “Hands on Parent”.

Find out about how Paul Anderson Family Ministries can help you.

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About the author

Dr. Drew Edwards
Dr. Drew Edwards is a behavioral health researcher, author, counselor, and the youth culture expert and consultant for the nationally syndicated reality television programs Ultimate Choice, and Real Girls-Real Life. In 2006 he founded ENNOBLE, Inc., a non profit educational foundation created to rescue teens and empower parents through the creative expression of Christian principles. His website, www.drdrewedwards.org, is a product of that mission. He has been working with families for twenty years. Dr. Drew was formerly Clinical Assistant Professor in the department of psychiatry and health behavior at the Medical College of Georgia. Previously he served as Associate Director of Psychiatry at the University of Florida. His appointment included program development, clinical practice and clinical instruction for psychiatric residents and postdoctoral fellows in the division of addiction medicine. Dr. Drew has published numerous peer reviewed and popular articles on parenting, behavioral health, addictions, depression/chronic illness and youth culture, as well handbooks for parents on childhood depression and self-esteem in children. He speaks at conferences and presents seminars throughout the United States on parenting, youth culture, teen sex, pornography, addictive disease and eating disorders. He also provides weekly parenting advice on 88.1 FM, The Promise, in Jacksonville and northeast Florida. He joined the staff of the PAYH in 2008.

1 Comment

Parents are the Teachers, not the culture | Parenting Style | Parent's Purpose

[...] often we see stories in the media of adults who have neglected their children, or have looked on, and in some cases helped their children and their friends get drunk, high, and [...]

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